One time in college, I went on a road trip with a random group of acquaintances to a conference in Iowa. To pass the time, we decided to play “20 Questions”–a real road trip classic, right?
This must have been the Fall of 2001, because that was the only period in my life when I was a white boy rocking some dreadlocks. Being my own self-inspiration, I thought that would be an interesting one to do when it came my turn.
Oh, and to be clear, I had chosen “dreadlocks,” not “white boy rocking some dreadlocks”…though in retrospect the latter might have been the more humorous choice.
Anyways, at one point I was asked “Does it have hair?”
*Record scratches*
I’m pretty sure I short-circuited in the face of this unanticipated, yet obvious, question. It was not patently obvious what the correct answer was, and I desperately begged them to choose a different question, as I could foresee both ‘yes’ and ‘no’ only causing more confusion and delay.
Nevertheless, they persisted, and forced me to answer that bedeviling question.
After much agonizing and gnashing of teeth, I went with “No”.
After all, it was hair, and those hairs did not have their own little hairs on them, right?
I wasn’t surprised, though, when the other team ended up running out of questions before guessing what it was.
The guy who had asked the ‘hair’ question was particularly livid when he found out the answer was “dreadlocks”, and was furious that I had answered “No”.
A heated philosophical debate ensued, attempting to answer the question “Can hair ‘have’ hair?”
The result? Let’s just say that someone almost ended up stranded in an Iowan cornfield without a ride home that autumn evening…
Oh, and the two of us never really spoke to each other ever again.
I guess the point of the story is that if you have a mediocre relationship with someone and are looking for a way to discreetly and justifiably cut them out of your life, just play 20 Questions and choose “dreadlocks” as your magic word.
You’re welcome.
Content created on: 24 April 2018 (originally via Twitter) & 8 October 2020 (Tues/Thurs)
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